This week’s Bachelor Steak

This week’s Bachelor Steak

This week’s Bachelor Steak

Men are good at brunt offerings, from the days of Moses, Elijah, Solomon and David. They all did these especially to cleanse their sins or the sins of their families. In this week you may have had several ‘sins’ committed during the weekend.

But we are not going to help you up the Holy of Hollies, just a steak recipe to help you learn some stuff in the kitchen.

What you need:

  1. 1 sirloin steak, for you and the boys (nuff said)
  2. Soy sauce.
  3. The cheapest red wine available (ha!).
  4. Garlic. By the way did you read about the health benefits of garlic? One more thing, just avoid lots of this in case your spouse is thinking of you 9 months fro now.
  5. A garlic-smashing tool.
  6. Propane gas grills, if you have one.

The man-u-al:

  1. Five or so hours before dinner, assault both sides the sirloin with a fork with a wide-ranging, rapid-fire motion. We are looking for a tight pattern of 1/2” deep holes covering the whole target. Be sure to is not around ( and the gals neither if you have evil plans about tom)
  2. Smash the garlic onto a paper plate with the garlic-smashing tool. Throw out the paper stuff and keep the mushy stuff that smells like pizza. (You are not a man if you don’t taste it and learn the lesson not to.)
  3. Slather the mushy stuff onto the top of the sirloin. We are looking for full, thin coverage here. You’ll probably only need 1/2 of whole garlic for this.
  4. Put the meat on a plate, garlic side up. Pour equal amounts soy sauce and red wine on it and let it pool up on the top of the oversized meat. Put it in the refrigerator. Ok tom cat may not actually have to be kicked out, yet
  5. Halfway to dinner time, scrape the garlic to the side of the plate (a putty knife works fine for this), pour the juices somewhere, flip the steak and re-apply both.
  6. At dinnertime, scrape off the garlic; pour the juices down the drain.
  7. Turn on the grill on high. Apply the steak.
  8. First: Searing. Give it about two minutes per side to sear the steak, sealing in the juices.
  9. Second: Turn the heat down (a little) and cook to taste.
  10. Mmmm-mmm.